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URGENT!!
From the Editors of the WCManual:
It has come to our attention that our human Mams and Dads are flagrantly violating many of
the cardinal rules of the 'Wild Child Manual', better known as the WCManual. We strongly suggest
that each of you immediately REMINDS your human of your preeminent role in the family!!
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Riley Rambunctious (L) and Katie WC(R)
Editors of the WCManual
Item #1 -- Gifts for Scottie "Head of House"
Chapter 1 ; Section 1.4 ; Paragraph 5 states:
"When any member of scottie family opens gifts, it is REQUIRED that
every 2nd gift be exclusively for the scottie of the house. NO exceptions!"
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Riley documents this oversight.
"Hey, Mam....is THAT one mine??? NO??
Well, how about THIS one?? Whatdya MEAN... NOO!!"
MORE evidence of a major rules infraction...
(L)Riley searches boxes for any stowaway gifts...
(R)Katie emerges from the MIDST of the pile of packages,
after a futile search for her NEXT gift!
Item #2 --
Failure to Maintain Scottie as CENTER of ATTENTION
Chapter 3 ; Section 3.6 ; Subsection 5; Paragraph 2 states:
"Every Scottie parent will, AT ALL TIMES, defer to wishes of
said scottie...who is to be considered THE CENTER of the
family's universe!"
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SHOCKING!!! Mam, Auntie, and Mammaw are actually IGNORING US!
This forces us to resort to tried and tested tactics.
Katie(L) uses her trusty Tennis Ball "Air Kong"...'play with me NOW'!
I, being a suave gentleman, use a more subtle approach...taking LAP control!!
Plan "B", we resort to FORCE!
We take YESTERDAY'S gift and take it to Auntie...to JOG her memory!
JUST BECAUSE we've received a DAILY gift for the last 3 days...
Doesn't mean that she should STOP NOW!!
"HERE!!! THIS is what we expect!!"
It finally comes down to desperate measures!
Riley(L) decides to take POSSESSION of Auntie's new fuzzy slipper!
After ALL, it DOES resemble a scottie 'woobie'!
MEANWHILE, Katie(R), being the world's most OBSESSED tennis ball
addict, refuses to accept the fact that the family may be IGNORING
her beloved toy!!
The SURE THING --
Effective Use of the "Awwwwww Factor"
Chapter 42; LAST Paragraph states:
"When ALLLL else fails, always remember to use the 'Awwww Factor'. It NEVER fails to
bring your human to their knees, to fall at your paws in obedient submission."
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Katie(L) prefers the 'cute tootsies' maneuver....
But, the BEST solution...climb up on the couch with Mammaw!!
Life doesn't GET any better than THAT!
Remember, WCGang members --- your humans need constant
reminders of your leadership and power. Keep your WCManuals handy,
and don't give your humans too much leash.... they DO
tend to be easily distracted!!!
Signed:
Katie WC and Riley Rambunctious, Editors-in-Chief
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©Copyright 2004-2005 All rights reserved.
You Can't Do That - Beatles
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